Very heartfelt and meaningful Kimber. Interestingly you mention reading the new testament. My belief came first from reading the new testament as a teen. I felt a deep kinship to the teachings of Jesus about turning the other cheek, loving your enemy, finding value outside of money, integrity and calling out hypocrisy. I actually felt very keenly the disconnect between "the church" and what Jesus actually taught most of my life. I still consider myself a "secular christian" if not a "real" christian and am exploring my spirituality still and what that means. I've actually found a lot of meaning in secular buddism and the parallels to new testament christianity. I think it's very wise of you to "disentangle" rather than throw it all away as many do. ❤️
This is such a beautiful, gentle cradling of something so tender and complex. Thank you for being vulnerable and giving your thoughts and feelings space to be. Following your intuition and carefully disentangling one piece at a time not knowing where it would leave “you” is so brave. It’s inspiring. ✨ Lots of love and support to you on your journey. 💕
Thank you so much for your comment!! I love that you said it was a “gentle cradling of something so tender and complex” - that’s what I was hoping to do, so I appreciate that’s how it came across for you 🩷
I stumbled upon your Substack while pondering grief (over the last 5 years, we are all grieving something 😩) and I am so grateful for your words. To know that there is someone else (I know I'm not alone, but hearing the words helps). Someone else that is "distangling" the church from faith. I am 40 years old (joined when I was 22) and trying to guide my own teenagers through this distangling. I thought I had lost my faith there for awhile, but I just bought a Mustard Seed necklace (beautiful idea) and will nurture what I've got.
Aw, Melissa, I appreciate you commenting. 💛 It can be such a lonely journey sometimes… I take heart knowing that there are so many of us in it together. Guiding children through it doesn’t sound easy, either. And I love that you got a mustard seed necklace! Seeing how small a mustard seed is feels encouraging on some days. Wishing you comfort and clarity. 💛
Also, I peeked at your bio, and I am an English teacher too! (Well, I am not teaching this year, but I have been the past few years!) Interestingly, teaching my students certain themes in literature really opened my eyes to a lot of systemic issues within the Church institution.
I am a 20 year veteran of the classroom 😆. I'm barely surviving there as well though. I've always been a seeker, pondering the ways stories shape our belief. It was my college English Professor that helped grow my faith in the church with her connections to ancient and modern story. Which is why I turn to Elder Holland and Uchdorf most often for solace. Do you read The Wayfarer? It's a great way to see how others are grappling with the Gospel as well. Terryl Givens is a frequent contributor.
Oh I feel you with classroom survival. I had a class last year that nearly broke me and I just needed a break this year from teaching full-time but still sub a few times a week. Yes, I am a longtime fan of Terryl Givens and have read some of Wayfarer here and there. I should give it another go! The associated Faith Matters podcast is great, too.
I don’t know if you even remember me. You came to my stake girls camp with your cousin, Cassidy, when you were 12.
Just wanted to say thank you. You have expressed so many feelings I have been scared and unable to share. It truly does feel like you are taking apart of yourself as you sort through what you believe and what you don’t. Thank you for your bravery and for sharing your disenganglement process ❤️
Kira, yes I absolutely remember you! I love that I still connect with so many people from your ward on social media. I know how scary it is to start re-evaluating your relationship with church. It gets better but it still is really hard, and just know I am with you on that journey! 🤍
Ok girl!!! You’re amazing! I’ve been in a similar boat the last 3 years. It’s a beautiful and sacred journey as we travel through the wilderness to find God. To truly be born again and born of God. I’d love to talk because I have received answers about polygamy and the Book of Mormon and why I stay. Lots of love to you for your courage!! I love your writing and the content you choose to share.
Thank you so much for reading and taking time to respond to my writing! 🫶🏽 I love the idea of being like the Israelites and traveling through the wilderness on the pursuit of God. I’d love to hear what insights you have on those topics! Feel free to reply to me here or we can DM on Instagram or something.
Thank you for sharing your heart and journey with your faith in Jesus Christ. I love you! ❤️
I love you! Thank you for reading! 🩷
Very heartfelt and meaningful Kimber. Interestingly you mention reading the new testament. My belief came first from reading the new testament as a teen. I felt a deep kinship to the teachings of Jesus about turning the other cheek, loving your enemy, finding value outside of money, integrity and calling out hypocrisy. I actually felt very keenly the disconnect between "the church" and what Jesus actually taught most of my life. I still consider myself a "secular christian" if not a "real" christian and am exploring my spirituality still and what that means. I've actually found a lot of meaning in secular buddism and the parallels to new testament christianity. I think it's very wise of you to "disentangle" rather than throw it all away as many do. ❤️
Thank you for reading and sharing a thoughtful response! Love hearing your experience with finding values and ideas that resonate with you.
This is such a beautiful, gentle cradling of something so tender and complex. Thank you for being vulnerable and giving your thoughts and feelings space to be. Following your intuition and carefully disentangling one piece at a time not knowing where it would leave “you” is so brave. It’s inspiring. ✨ Lots of love and support to you on your journey. 💕
Thank you so much for your comment!! I love that you said it was a “gentle cradling of something so tender and complex” - that’s what I was hoping to do, so I appreciate that’s how it came across for you 🩷
I stumbled upon your Substack while pondering grief (over the last 5 years, we are all grieving something 😩) and I am so grateful for your words. To know that there is someone else (I know I'm not alone, but hearing the words helps). Someone else that is "distangling" the church from faith. I am 40 years old (joined when I was 22) and trying to guide my own teenagers through this distangling. I thought I had lost my faith there for awhile, but I just bought a Mustard Seed necklace (beautiful idea) and will nurture what I've got.
Aw, Melissa, I appreciate you commenting. 💛 It can be such a lonely journey sometimes… I take heart knowing that there are so many of us in it together. Guiding children through it doesn’t sound easy, either. And I love that you got a mustard seed necklace! Seeing how small a mustard seed is feels encouraging on some days. Wishing you comfort and clarity. 💛
Also, I peeked at your bio, and I am an English teacher too! (Well, I am not teaching this year, but I have been the past few years!) Interestingly, teaching my students certain themes in literature really opened my eyes to a lot of systemic issues within the Church institution.
I am a 20 year veteran of the classroom 😆. I'm barely surviving there as well though. I've always been a seeker, pondering the ways stories shape our belief. It was my college English Professor that helped grow my faith in the church with her connections to ancient and modern story. Which is why I turn to Elder Holland and Uchdorf most often for solace. Do you read The Wayfarer? It's a great way to see how others are grappling with the Gospel as well. Terryl Givens is a frequent contributor.
Oh I feel you with classroom survival. I had a class last year that nearly broke me and I just needed a break this year from teaching full-time but still sub a few times a week. Yes, I am a longtime fan of Terryl Givens and have read some of Wayfarer here and there. I should give it another go! The associated Faith Matters podcast is great, too.
I don’t know if you even remember me. You came to my stake girls camp with your cousin, Cassidy, when you were 12.
Just wanted to say thank you. You have expressed so many feelings I have been scared and unable to share. It truly does feel like you are taking apart of yourself as you sort through what you believe and what you don’t. Thank you for your bravery and for sharing your disenganglement process ❤️
Kira, yes I absolutely remember you! I love that I still connect with so many people from your ward on social media. I know how scary it is to start re-evaluating your relationship with church. It gets better but it still is really hard, and just know I am with you on that journey! 🤍
Ok girl!!! You’re amazing! I’ve been in a similar boat the last 3 years. It’s a beautiful and sacred journey as we travel through the wilderness to find God. To truly be born again and born of God. I’d love to talk because I have received answers about polygamy and the Book of Mormon and why I stay. Lots of love to you for your courage!! I love your writing and the content you choose to share.
Thank you so much for reading and taking time to respond to my writing! 🫶🏽 I love the idea of being like the Israelites and traveling through the wilderness on the pursuit of God. I’d love to hear what insights you have on those topics! Feel free to reply to me here or we can DM on Instagram or something.
Kimber, your words quite literally pulled me out of a depressing spiral. Thank you SO much, you have no idea how much this post has helped me.
Wow, Callie! I’m so grateful to hear that. I’ve been in those spirals before, and I’m glad this post came at a fitting time for you. 🤍